September is National Grandparents Appreciation Month and one local family says their lives are richer and brighter for having a beloved gradparent living with them.
Casey and Robbie Smith are proud to have Robbie’s grandmother, Yvonne Murphy, living with them full time.
“She’s a lot of fun. She likes to cut up and you don’t have to be a certain way around her,” says Casey Smith. “It is nice to just come home and eat together and chat and be with each other.”
Soon to be 86 years old, Murphy is R. Smith’s maternal grandmother. Born and raised in Pierce County, Murphy was a homemaker with three children. When her daughter, R. Smith’s mother, died, Murphy was the one to step into the motherly role in her grandson’s life. Naturally, Murphy and her grandson have always been close thereafter.
That closeness only grew with the years, enfolding Casey as well when she and Robbie married in 2009. Now, with children of their own, the Smiths have still always kept Murphy, known to most as “Nannie”, deeply woven into the fabric of their family. Nor is it just the Smiths’ immediate family that love Murphy.
“My niece and nephew will tell you that’s their grandma, their Nannie too,” says C. Smith. “Even my friends call her Nannie. When she comes to the office, even the people I work with call her Nannie.”
The office Casey Smith speaks of is a dental care association where she works as an office manager. Meanwhile, her husband works nights at the railroad. C. Smith says the arrangement is ideal, because it allows for someone to always be available for Murphy.
“She can do things for herself, but why should she have to?” asks C. Smith. “My husband and I are old souls and believe in taking care of family first.”
In a way, moving Murphy into their home full time was just making official something they already knew. Nannie was an indispensable part of their lives, so much so the couple can’t imagine it without her. Family trips, birthdays, vacations, the beloved grandmother has been there, not on the sidelines but as an active participant.
Three years ago, before Murphy ever came to live with the Smiths full time, they took her to Disney World, but Murphy did not go just to enjoy the sights.
“She went on all the rides and she loved it,” says C. Smith, a smile in her voice. “She closed the park down and was there when they set off the fireworks.”
Murphy has lived in her grandson’s house for approximately five or six weeks now, and not much has changed in that time. If anything, some things are easier.
“Cooking is my love language, so I was always bringing her food anyway. I called myself her Meals on Wheels, cooking and prepackaging meals for about two years,” says C. Smith. “I would take care of errands for her too, but it was really beneficial and simplified things to live together.”
Asked if the extra work is worth it, C. Smith answers with an unhesistating affirmative.
“This was not a hard decision for me. I was taught family is everything,” she says. “We do it not because we have to, but because we want to. The common misconception is the elderly are a burden. They aren’t a burden but a blessing So many generations miss out on what grandparents can bring to their lives.”
In the near future, Murphy looks forward to her 86th birthday and a special reunion with her cousins, both taking place in October. After that, she still has a trip to Dollywood to cross off her bucket list.
As for the many people to whom Muphy is lovingly known as Nannie, they all look forward to making more memories where an elderly family member is a centerpiece.
